Jump to content

Cre8asiteforums Internet Marketing
and Conversion Web Design


Photo

I Left Facebook


  • Please log in to reply
15 replies to this topic

#1 cre8pc

cre8pc

    Dream Catcher Forums Founder

  • Admin - Top Level
  • 14673 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 11:38 AM

I left Facebook today.

 

Uninstalled it from every computer device and like an addict, using my willpower to not log in from anywhere.  Since Chrome is always open, I had to go into my settings to block Facebook from notifying me every time a friend posts something.

 

Why?

I no longer can stand the newsfeed and all the trash my "friends" are posting.  For starters, many are not real friends. In real life, I have nothing in common with a lot of my "followers" and after seeing what they post on Facebook, I wouldn't be friends with them in real life.

 

It's not a matter of agreement either.  Stock and I disagree sometimes but I adore him.  There's people who can discuss any topic and remain open to you as a person, and people who simply can't do that.  

 

On Facebook, fake news and propaganda pieces are posted, shared and reposted without people doing any research first.  The hate pieces...the mood in the US is unlike anything I've ever experienced.  I'm extremely open minded and open hearted, which makes me a minority. The oddest thing I've noticed is how my two sons are acting.  They've become extremely protective of me. They are afraid for me.  

 

Facebook gave everyone a voice and you can say that's good. I'm not so sure it is. 

 

 



#2 iamlost

iamlost

    The Wind Master

  • Site Administrators
  • 5379 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 11:58 AM

FB as with most/all SM simply amplifies the concept of community. The trick is to restrict your contact to family, friends and colleagues AND put them in bounded groups where possible or separate accounts.

The current habit of auto following everyone who follows you is asinine. Also ridiculous is the broadening of what a friend is. Being friendly isn't being friends, an acquaintance is not a friend, a colleague is not necessarily a friend, etc.

You are a friendly outgoing type person whose glass is always half full. Which makes you a target and vulnerable emotionally.

If you can't or won't limit your community of SM involvement cutting it out, at least for a time is probably a necessary healthy behaviour. Before rejoining a SM platform, if you do, please take the time to restrict connections to the available maximum. There be monsters out there; monsters who only look human.

And kudos to your kids!

#3 bobbb

bobbb

    Sonic Boom Member

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 3313 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 12:26 PM

Is congratulations appropriate here?

 

I never joined and know many people who have not either.

 

People who know me know how to contact me.



#4 earlpearl

earlpearl

    Hall of Fame

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 2410 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 12:30 PM

Probably good to leave.   In that I'm old, Kim, I recall the political environment around the war in Vietnam.  It was every bit as vicious.  But there was no social media.   So if you opened your mouth it was face to face. or part of some group--> a lot of faces (angry faces) facing a lot of faces (equally angry faces).   At times there was violence.    At other times folks backed off a bit.  Because the anger was such if you pushed it ..it led to violence.

 

With SM, one can raise the level of anger to a degree that if you were face to face there would be violence.   The SM voices can be louder and more vicious.  

 

And that is tough to take.  I follow folks of many different stripes.  These days I rarely post but I do comment.   Overall commentary is stunning, from my perspective, and surprising, but it is revealing.  It might be healthy for me to leave also.   This damn political race is like a dangerous train wreck that I'm having a hard time disengaging from and am watching in a sick way.  I'm finding its not healthy for my emotional state.

 

Take care of your emotional state.



#5 cre8pc

cre8pc

    Dream Catcher Forums Founder

  • Admin - Top Level
  • 14673 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 01:00 PM

I remember the Vietnam and Korean wars...more so Vietnam, which ended when I was a Junior in HS.  I was outspoken back then, using my role with the high school newspaper (I was the longest staff member, from junior to senior high and moved up to Editor in Chief), to write about it.  Later in college, as a Journalism major, and again reporter who worked up to the Editor in Chief role of the college newspaper, I wrote about politics, women's issues, nuclear power, (3 Mile Island happened then), etc.

 

I was never treated badly then. Never. 

 

What SM has done is provide a space for people to communicate behind protective walls.  We don't see their facial expressions or body language.  We don't have to know each other to comment and share content. It bothers me that people ask to friend me, when they don't know anything about me and only have someone in common. I don't accept everybody but because of these forums, my work and wide interests, it's difficult to choose sometimes. I've removed so many people or unfollowed already.

 

The most difficult part for me is learning things about people that I thought I knew.  This has just blown me away and finally forced me to end the game. Watching people you care about being manipulated and controlled is too hard for me.  And when I've tried to point out something as simple as a link to a fake news site, they respond with venom.  

 

There's nothing in that kind of environment that appeals to me and so I left.



#6 jonbey

jonbey

    Eyes Like Hawk Moderator

  • Moderators
  • 4748 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 03:16 PM

I use Facebook a lot, but I take the opposite approach - I limit to real friends as much as I can. I culled a lot of people a year or so back, and if my friends post stuff I am not interested in, I use that "hide all posts from website X" button (one real friend posts loads of football stuff, I never see his football stuff now, just pics of the kids etc). 

 

Facebook is like any service - learn to use it to your advantage, don't just do what everybody else does. I know people who have 1500 "friends". I have 144 friends. Some I have hardly spoken to in 10 years, some are family members who I never talk to (we don't speak the same language, so I have a good excuse), but all I have met at some point. 

 

Facebook is a great way to stay in contact with real friends. Without it, I would have lost contact with a lot more people than I already have.



#7 cre8pc

cre8pc

    Dream Catcher Forums Founder

  • Admin - Top Level
  • 14673 posts

Posted 02 November 2016 - 04:12 PM

I hear you Jonbey.  I've culled mine at 3 or 4 times this year and either unfriended or unfollowed.  However, I maintain several Facebook pages for clients, plus have the one for these forums and one non-profit one that I manage, so what happened is that people from one of them would want to friend me on my personal page.

 

This won't be forever and I still have to go there for the ones I manage.  But turning off mine has made today rather peaceful  :manicure:



#8 cre8pc

cre8pc

    Dream Catcher Forums Founder

  • Admin - Top Level
  • 14673 posts

Posted 03 November 2016 - 08:56 AM

Update:  LOTS to think about.  My family all had opinions on my leaving and suggestions for how to deal with FB, including taking a break but not leaving for good. I've heard from friends who really don't want me to leave but support the break, and several who just want to know if I'm ok. (I am.)

 

I went in yesterday when I was told I had a lot of comments and some were interesting, like the one person who said I'm not facing reality. I'm creating my own and it doesn't include nasty stupid uninformed crap.  I stopped watching TV for the same reasons.

 

The most interesting observation so far is that the friends I'm connected to who turned out to be the most hateful, bigoted, etc. did NOT respond.  Not a single one. Which makes it easy for me to decide who to unfollow and unfriend when I return after the election. In real life, I never liked fake friends either  :emo_gavel:



#9 jonbey

jonbey

    Eyes Like Hawk Moderator

  • Moderators
  • 4748 posts

Posted 03 November 2016 - 04:13 PM

.... I maintain several Facebook pages for clients, plus have the one for these forums and one non-profit one that I manage, so what happened is that people from one of them would want to friend me on my personal page.

 

Yep, click that ignore button!



#10 jonbey

jonbey

    Eyes Like Hawk Moderator

  • Moderators
  • 4748 posts

Posted 03 November 2016 - 04:16 PM

Why not just go through your list of friends and answer this: if your phone rang now and their face came up, would you answer for a friendly (not work related, not networking) chat? If no, unfriend them. Don't tell anybody you are doing this. Hopefully you will be left with your real friends and family. Be ruthless - if we are friends on FB (I honestly am not sure if we are!) hit that unfriend button. You will enjoy Facebook more, as you will then only be seeing your friends and family, and nothing else. And don't be afraid of the ignore and block buttons - they are there to help you enjoy your use of Facebook!



#11 glyn

glyn

    Sonic Boom Member

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 3211 posts

Posted 04 November 2016 - 02:38 PM

I frequently remove stuff from my feed. I also have timeline review which means if i am tagged i have to review it first before it is added.

#12 earlpearl

earlpearl

    Hall of Fame

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 2410 posts

Posted 08 January 2017 - 04:47 PM

A little while ago I engaged someone I know on the web wherein we shared a lot of learning years ago. Became friendly.

More recently his tweets and my tweets when covering politics are at opposite ends. To a certain degree we'll also "engage" those who disagree with us. Needless to say it's not pretty.

Now he and I have never "gotten into it". In fact I didn't know if he still follows me on Twitter. He does as I follow him. Politically he doesn't take me on nor do I take him on and we don't get vicious and ugly with one another.

His comment on that was if people said in person what they do on the web the murder rate would go up. My comment has been if I said in person what I say on the web my nose would punch out a lot of fists.

We may be on opposite political sides but we agree with how freaking nasty the web is.

The commentary is beyond what used to be normal bounds. Just how bad are the consequences?? Not sure but I don't believe they are good.
A little while ago I engaged someone I know on the web wherein we shared a lot of learning years ago. Became friendly.

More recently his tweets and my tweets when covering politics are at opposite ends. To a certain degree we'll also "engage" those who disagree with us. Needless to say it's not pretty.

Now he and I have never "gotten into it". In fact I didn't know if he still follows me on Twitter. He does as I follow him. Politically he doesn't take me on nor do I take him on and we don't get vicious and ugly with one another.

His comment on that was if people said in person what they do on the web the murder rate would go up. My comment has been if I said in person what I say on the web my nose would punch out a lot of fists.

We may be on opposite political sides but we agree with how freaking nasty the web is.

The commentary is beyond what used to be normal bounds. Just how bad are the consequences?? Not sure but I don't believe they are good.

#13 bobbb

bobbb

    Sonic Boom Member

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 3313 posts

Posted 08 January 2017 - 05:16 PM

I bet there is one thing about politics both would agree to. Politicians in general are liars and are a necessary evil. See I lie also. That was two.

Even the ones I voted for have to lie at times. That's how it works.



#14 earlpearl

earlpearl

    Hall of Fame

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 2410 posts

Posted 08 January 2017 - 06:10 PM

I never lie. I lied about that. 😇

Oh my head hurts

#15 EGOL

EGOL

    Professor

  • Hall Of Fame
  • 6320 posts

Posted 08 January 2017 - 08:20 PM

I tried to leave FB a few times. There doesn't seem to be a "total delete". Some of your stuff remains out there.

Edited by EGOL, 08 January 2017 - 08:20 PM.


#16 Nny777

Nny777

    Gravity Master Member

  • Members
  • 187 posts

Posted 10 January 2017 - 04:32 AM

People talk a lot about echo chambers and personal bubbles on social media...but as long as you know it isn't representative of everyone, I don't see what's so wrong with having a small space carved out where you don't need to feel panicky or excluded! Not everyone on my Facebook has the same opinions as me, but I do cull anyone who can't disagree with me in a rational, adult way. And yeah, sometimes I delete people because their negativity outweighs any positive benefit their presence adds to my life, but my Facebook is *my* space to keep in touch with friends, get invites for events, and discuss things I find important.

 

Do what you've got to do to make you happy, whether that means leaving Facebook (although good luck deleting it entirely) or just very strictly enforcing who you have on there. There are plenty of places on the internet (and in real life) where you'll face horrible people with drastically different opinions to yours - I don't think having one safe space is the end of the world.





RSS Feed

0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users